Self confidence issue

by Ano nymous

I am 23 years old. in high school I was outgoing I was kind I had more friends than I knew what to do with and I had at least 1 girl crushing on me at all times. Now that I'm done bragging I'll start my story where my problem began.

I became involved with a girl my junior year. She was a sophomore. I have nothing bad to say about her. She was great. Our relationship lasted 5 years. We broke about a year ago of course I was devastated for a little while and went through all the emotions that a broken heart bring out. Now I feel personally that this relationship tore apart my self confidence, my funk, my groove. She was a very shy girl and tended to get embarrassed by my personality. I will admit though sometimes I was a little wild but it was always in good fun. It's how I was. But as she became more comfortable with me she told me and being understanding I tried to not be so embarrassing.

This ultimately was the cause of death of my confidence. After time I just became antisocial. We spent all of our free time together.... For 5 years.... Well I guess 4 of the 5.
Now I have trouble speaking my mind. I have absolutely zero confidence talking to women.... Even my coworkers who I've worked with for over a year. Talking to new people period has become a challenge I've never before seen. It used to come so easy.
I've resorted to confidence boosters ( alcohol and cocaine to be specific) to give a temporary fix on my problem thinking I could carry it over to the sober world but that hasn't worked. Still drink because it's social, legal and fun but no more drugs.
I just can't seem to regain my confidence back. I cant really connect with my friends anymore and I definitely can't connect with women anymore either. We still share the same interests as we always have. I feel alone in my own self pity.
How on earth can I get my confidence back?

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Self confidence issue
by: Anonymous

A break up of a relationship is like a death, it is the finish of an association and regardless of the reasons, there is often emptiness and grief involved. When you have taken someone for granted, it is a shock when they tell you that they no longer want an association with you, it is like a punch in the stomach area.

It will take you time to get over this and in the meantime you need to go out and about and mix with other people.
People change over the years and at the end of the five years you were together, maybe one or other or the both of you had changed.
There is no reason why someone else will not come into your life in the future and with what you have learned in the past, put it to good use.

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