self confidence, i think?
Something is majorly wrong with me. I am a very successful girl. I am 18 and in uni, I'm very friendly and nice, and popular and all that you want.
I've suffered sometimes from not knowing how to get along with people, and I figured later on, it's because of my low self esteem.
My parents were divorced 8 years ago, and my mom suffers a lot from low self esteem and self image, even though she's very successful. I feel we have this weakness in the family but I feel I got over it.
At one point I was so confident the beginning of this semester, and my relationships were going great, even though there were problems, but my self esteem was high enough for me to be OK and deal with everything, until the weekend came!
I met with my family, and got in one of the fights we usually have with my older sisters. We are always in fights, little things turn big, and because I am the youngest I am always wrong. I react to everything, and they expect me to be OK with whatever they say. We always fight, and its gets really bad and big. It gets physical sometime and all the words said are hurtful and bad. I am always the cause of the problem to them.
I feel like they hate me, even though they act like they don't. I feel our relationship has finally failed. I am always the problem to them and am full of mistakes, and have to end up apologizing and fixing it up. It just hurts and since then I feel dreadful. I feel like I failed in a relationship, which makes my self confidence really low.
I cant deal with people normally and I cant face them I'd rather not be around them, because I feel I mess up, I am not liking myself, and I'm feeling really bad. I am messing up all the relationships around me. It's like I am out of control and afraid to do anything!
Please help me I don't know what the problem is and I don't know what to do.