paranoia, low self confidence, low motivation

by damien
(birmingham uk)

I want to thank you for this website. I do need help but I don't know what it is. I struggle to speak with people. I have a business that could make me a millionaire if I wanted it to but I don't have the motivation to push for it.

I fear rejection and often struggle to speak with people, often have nothing to say and when I don't say anything I then feel like an idiot. Like the saying if you put your head in the sand people will only see an ass, I have had a hell of a lot of rejection in my life so I think I know the reason I don't put myself out there is because I think I will just get rejected again.

I really do appreciate the site, it has helped me massively, my mind is fighting with itself at the minute with positive and negative thoughts which is a good thing, that is only down to this website, before finding this site it was just run with negative self destructive thoughts.

Love to the webmaster/s

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fearful thoughts
by: Kay

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth, and for your comments. Fearful thoughts sap motivation and stop you living your life in the way you want it. Fear does not exist, it is literally a thought that comes into your mind, you react to it, boom, there's the doubt in yourself back again.

Fear is stopping you moving forward. You are not doing things because when you feel this fear you let it overtake you and believe that you wont be successful so why bother. How can you know you wont succeed when you don't even give yourself the chance to find out?

I know of another saying, 'Feel the fear and do it anyway'. Much better than the one you are living by don't you think? Imagine how strong, confident and motivated you will feel when you stare fear in the face, refuse to give into it and succeed!

When you focus on something often it becomes your reality. Focus on how great you are (not how great you can be, but on how great you are)the more you say it to yourself the sooner it will become your reality.

The next time you find yourself struggling to talk, ask the person about himself, about interests, hobby, favourite music, movies, anything that takes the focus off how you are feeling and enables you to relax.

The person may be feeling the same as you, and be happy to have something to speak about! Get him to open up about himself. You should find that questions you ask will allow him to ask you questions that will rid you of the knot of fear you started off with.

Unless you give something a go you are never going to know whether you can do it. Refuse to accept these fearful thoughts by doing what you fear. If you should fail, pick yourself up and have another go, and another, if necessary, it's the only way to go don't you think?

Good luck, stay positive.


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