My boyfriend always assumes that the negative is going to happen and he puts himself down

by Charlotte
(Nashville, TN)

When we talk about plans he always thinks that either it's not going to happen or that something bad will happen and ruin it. He doesn't like to talk about things unless it is going to happen that day.

He also puts himself down a lot and I tell him that he's not that way but he says he is, but he never believes me.

Comments for My boyfriend always assumes that the negative is going to happen and he puts himself down

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negative self talk
by: Kay

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth.

I admire you for wanting to help your boyfriend, however unless he chooses to change it's just not going to happen.

Can you tell him that he causes his own problems with the negative self talk. Let him know that he has spent so long feeding all this negative stuff to himself that he now believes it is true.

Tell him that his sub conscious doesn't know the difference between the truth and a lie, and so it now believes when he says nothing good is going to happen, and it doesn't because what he has focused on becomes the truth.

Once he accepts this, he can start to focus on positive thoughts, that will in time become true, because his sub conscious will accept it as the truth. When he focuses on positive stuff he will get positive results.

I recommend that you either borrow or buy the DVD The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. This DVD will be life changing to him, and you, if you both choose to act on it. Make sure you watch it with him and you can hear his comments and see how he is reacts to it.

When he comes to realize that it is his own thoughts that make his reality, he will be able to change them and move forward in a positive way, if he chooses.

I hope this works for him.


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