Hello, I'm 15 years old (16 in November), and I've got really low self esteem and confidence. I am always shy and so I can't make any friends because I don't know how to..
I told myself many times that I will change. I was consulting with Council and teachers in school, but it only made me feel worse.. I just want someone who I can talk to, but I don't have anyone like that. My family isn't the best and we have many problems.. My relations with mum are really bad and I don't have dad he abandoned me when I was about 6, I've got 3 siblings. I really don't know what I'm to do, because I really don't like my school or should I say that I hate it?!
When I was 11 I moved to N.I. ever since then everything makes me feel depressed, first 2 years went alright, but in last year something changed there were times that I even had suicidal thoughts and I did cut my self.. The only thing that i enjoy at the moment is Music, that's the only thing I like in whole world. When I'm sad or happy it helps me overcome my problem, but still I can only feel loneliness I know that there's something missing inside of me, but well i just can't figure out what..
As you read this you may think that I am pathetic, but I really don't have anyone who I could talk to so please don't be harsh when writing a response..