How does one begin rise above the anxiety of being in public and feeling less then others?

by Laurel
(St Johns , NL)

My problem is that I feel ugly, beneath everyone. I am afraid of being in public for fear of being mocked and laughed at.

I know realistically that not everyone views me as I do myself but saying it and believing it is a totally different thing. I feel that I am unworthy, undesirable and that no one could possibly like the person that I am.

I could go on to list how I view myself but it would take a long time.I want to be a stronger, more confident woman. Who will not be afraid to speak up, to say what is on my mind. I no longer want to be held back by fear of how others view me. What they think of me.

I want to feel as important and as valuable as other people, not shrink away and then be angry and down on myself for not being true to me and and the person I could be.I want to have faith in and believe in myself. I do not know how to get past this.

I have tried self help. affirmations, meditation the whole deal but I always come back to feeling something is lacking. I realize that there are others who feel similar to what I do and think it would be beneficial if I could have contact with such people.

Sometimes it is helpful to know that another understands. It will be less lonely knowing that support is available because obviously others who are confident would not understand.

Do you know of such resources support groups via the net. Your help would be much appreciated.

Comments for How does one begin rise above the anxiety of being in public and feeling less then others?

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Finding value in yourself
by: Mark Cameron

Shew Laurel, it takes one very brave to be as honest as you have been. Well done. The way I see it is that any lack results from some fear you have created within. I must let you know that fear is just an illusion, that everything around us is an illusion and the only thing real is love. Love for ourselves, the whole world and everyone in it. Everything is contained in our thoughts, and as you have admitted , such thoughts are not your reality. So the very simple answer is to change your thoughts. It takes practice, but when you achieve it, you will see the techniques you have learned and the affirmations you have done will now be prevalent in your life.

One of the ways in which I rid myself of all negative thoughts is to shout "OUT" to those thoughts. Negative thoughts serve us no purpose, not now, not ever. So kick them out. And then try to stay in a no thought zone for a while or replace the bad thoughts with good thoughts. That is the only way for me. I suffered similar stuff to you, and as a "fearbuster", I bust those negative thoughts quickly. I will remind you again, negative thoughts serve you no purpose. Not now, not ever.

Thoughts are things, always choose the good ones. If you wish to chat more on this, my email is, my services are free.
Love and light and no thought blessings to you
Mark Cameron

In all honesty , you have to admit, there there is nothing not to like about you. I have no idea who you are, but I am confident enough to say that you are a beautiful soul. Your focus is too much in the negative, without seeing that the beauty of you lies within, and is screaming to erupt.

You Will Rise Above Anxiety
by: Stacey.

Dear Laurel,

After reading your letter I wish I could come and give you a big hug!!

I know it must be so hard for you feeling the way you do but you will get past this stage in your life.

You are taking the right steps, keep on with the meditation and the positive affirmations, they will help you to realise what a beautiful soul you truly are.

Look at your letter, write it all again but change it into positives using "I can, I will, and I am" and read out loud a lot!!

Every day read it and reread it until you believe it. Someone recently advised me that some times "you have to fake it to make it" Imagine saying every day as part of your letter "I AM as important and I AM as valuable as other people."

You can, and will do this Laurel, one day at a time, trust in yourself.

Sending you support,
Love and Rainbows!!!

Stacey x

Self Belief
by: Kay

Hi Laurel, thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth. I understand how you are feeling, I truly do. I have felt the same as you throughout my life, and I know how insignificant you feel at times, and how you believe people wont want you to join their group as you think they wont want to hear what you have to say because you don't feel worthy or interesting enough. I have felt this way too.

This is why I have built this website. I understand, I know what it's like to want to be popular but feel that you don't belong, that no one wants to be with you. It's horrible to have no self-worth.

There are over 100 pages dedicated to help make you be the way you want to be. They can be accessed from the site map. Take your time and look through ones that catch your eye, see if there's anything that you can relate to. I am sure there is, because I have written these pages because I have felt how you do at present.

When you have self esteem problems, it can take years to try improve yourself. You have this little voice inside you that tells you all these untrue things about yourself.

You mention in your message that you could go on to list how you view yourself. This in itself a huge clue to helping solve your problem! You view yourself in all these negative ways don't you. In your heart of heart you know you aren't being true to yourself. You know you are much better than how you view yourself.

You say you have done affirmations, self help books etc, but always end up feeling something is lacking. Which of course it is! The big thing that is lacking in your life is belief in yourself.

You don't believe in yourself.

This is your problem in a nutshell! You can try all the things on this earth in connection with self-help, personal; growth, self development, but if you don't believe in yourself, it aint gonna happen!! :)

Your self talk is absolutely vital. You should stop all those negative thoughts now if not sooner! Stop focusing on what you can't do and start telling yourself what you can do.

Telling yourself good positive information has got to be better than running yourself down all the time.

Don't give up on your self talk, listen to what you say about yourself, make everything positive. Tell yourself you are beautiful, worthwhile, fun to be around, that people love your company.

I know it wont be easy, but you have to get over these feelings of inadequacy, and push yourself to do things that you don't think you are capable

Know that you are a valuable and important human being, you know you are but at this point in time you don't believe it.

So, promise me Laurel that from today you will change from negative self talk to positive. Promise me this, and when you don't give up you will blossom into the truly wonderful young woman you know in your heart that you are.

It will work, I know.
Love light and rainbows, Kay

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