by Tshepo
(Cape Town)

I have plenty of fears. A fear to present in front of class, a fear to go out, I just sit alone in my room. A fear to talk and listen or understand because I think the way I do this is unacceptable. If someone says something I quickly think negatively about what she/he said.

I do not do things because I think that the time is not right, things like studying, I think that people will say are you crazy this is not the correct time for that. A fear of being with many people, Sometimes I take out my cellphone and do as if I am free. A fear of waiting in a queue, I feel uncomfortable.

I used to be happy I had a sense of humor, but now I am a sad person

Comments for Fear

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by: Kay

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth. Your fears are caused by the thoughts you have. Fear does not exist, you cannot touch it, but you make it real by accepting the thoughts you allow into your mind.

When you accept this, you will, I hope, see that if you can change those fearful thoughts and replace them with thoughts about how confident you are (even though at first you may not feel this way) you will in time get rid of the fear, because good thoughts will replace bad ones.

You hold yourself back with your negative thoughts. You are not doing or saying things 'in case they aren't right' you are setting yourself up for failure by visualizing a negative outcome before you have even tried.

Why not tell yourself you are going to do something because you know you can, because you have the confidence to at least try. Then, believing you can be successful, give whatever it is a go, and even though you may fail you have the knowledge that you tried, and in that failure will be success because you gave it a go.

Don't hold yourself back from doing things because of what others may think. It's how you feel that's important, how you feel about you as a person. At the moment you allow fearful thoughts to enter your sub conscious, and this is how you enable this fear to grow out of proportion, because as I have said, fear exists only in your mind, it is but a thought. When you don't have the thoughts you will have no fear.

Change the thoughts you have from negative to positive, stay determined, talk to yourself in your mind about how brave, confident, wonderful, clever, (anyway you want to be!) you are and knock those fearful thoughts out of that head of yours!

You can do it, I know you can, you just have to believe it.

Good luck,


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