Anxiety, Guilt and Alcoholism

by Edgar
(North Carolina, USA)

I was working at the airline industry for 9 years. The working conditions in the last two years changed to the worst. That in return, gave me the drive to look for something else. During my last two years of work, I decided to study about the financial markets. I also started to manage my own personal savings.


During my last year of working for the airline, and was struggling to accommodate my hours to do both activities. I kept a record of my stock trading for the last year and a half. Even though I have my up and down months, I had a good trading record overall.

I noticed that trading could be a very profitable business, (having the right discipline and knowledge), that it would give me the economic freedom and I would do be doing something that I like to do.

However, the feeling of guilt arose on me when I realized that by quitting my job, my parents, friends, and ex-partner, I would be taking away the flying benefits that I had been providing in my 9 years of service. Two months before giving my resignation, anxiety started to grow on me that I started to drink small to medium quantities of alcohol to calm these feeling


My last month of work was the hardest-----Guilt start to grow more on me when I also realized that I was making almost 5 times more money than my co-workers at the airline were making. ..... I felt as if I did not deserve to have that financial freedom and they did not, specially working under those working conditions.

Once I quit this past September, the guilt feeling grew more that I started to drink out of control. That in return made me lose discipline in my trading career----Unfortunately, the stock market crashed in September and October. Because I was blinded by the alcohol, I ignored to monitor my account.......In two months, not only did I lose all my profits from the previous two years, but I lost almost all my investment as well

I have now became addicted to alcohol and don't seem to be able to quit. At night times, I would like to go back in time and fix my errors, but I know that it is not possible. However, that creates anxiety. ....It seems that I sabotage good things that happen in my life

What can you advise me to overcome these guilt, anxiety and alcohol problem?


Comments for Anxiety, Guilt and Alcoholism

Click here to add your own comments

Anxiety and alcohol problems
by: Kay

Hello Edgar,

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth.
The most important thing I have learned from reading your message is that you admit you have a problem with alcohol. This in itself is a huge step that will enable you to work through this difficult emotional time.

The first thing I would recommend is that you seek help for your alcoholism. I imagine there will be an Alcoholics Anonymous group in your area that you can make phone contact with to talk to people who understand what you are going through, and who will be able to help you overcome this problem.

I do not feel that you did the wrong thing by quitting a job in which you were no longer happy. Each of us has to do what is right for us, and you were right to put yourself first, even though your family missed out on the travel opportunities that they gained as a result of your job.

The fact that you were able to work the financial markets is credit to you! You say you noticed that trading could be a very profitable business that would give you the economic freedom, and more importantly, you would be doing something you enjoyed. When you free yourself from your problem with alcohol you will still have the same discipline and knowledge to resume a job that you like to do.

If it concerns you that the money is too easy to make, why not decide to give a portion away to a charity? This should make you feel good about what you are doing, and help rid you of your anxiety.

You are right, you cannot go back in the past and put right errors. The only mistake that you have made that I can see, is to start drinking the alcohol. Everything else is to your credit, even though perhaps people did not agree with what you were doing, it was right for you. This is the important thing.

Stop looking back and start looking forward. You can't change the past but you can shape the future. You can stop drinking and pick up the threads of your life again. Each day can be a new start for you if you let it.

Your own thoughts, coupled with the alcohol causes your anxiety. Stop these thoughts, put them out of your mind. Replace them with thoughts about a successful future, doing what you want to do. Visualize yourself as being successful and hold firmly on to that vision until it becomes a reality.

Work towards it, slowly but surely, stay positive and know you will succeed. Take one day at a time Edgar, become positive in your ability to overcome.

Have you thought about getting a part time job, and, when you are ready, starting to work the financial markets again until you no longer need the employment?

Good luck with the new exciting future that you decide to build for yourself.

Love,
Kay

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Need Personal Growth Advice?.