no self-confidence.

by lack confidence

This is the first time I'm confessing my problems, Nobody except you(the reader) knows I have had these feelings all my life.

I'm a 26 year old male, I've procrastinated all my life in most to-do things. Especially when I'm not enjoying it.

I wasn't very good at studies in school and repeated three years, in different classes/grades. As a result, I passed out of my school at the age of 21. I was always made fun of by other students and teachers, I saw kids junior to me become my seniors and was under constant mental stress throughout my short-lived academic career.

After school I never really went to college simply because I never scored enough to get into a good one, so I applied for a correspondence (distance) normal bachelors course instead. I failed my 1st year and discontinued my
graduation.

I am also a coward. However, I was under the impression that I had gotten over that feeling by indulging in fights whenever I could but sometime last year I was bullied by 3 guys in a mall and the same adrenalin rush happened which causes my body to spaz out and makes me feel completely uncomfortable and helpless.

On the other hand, I have been a guy of many talents, and began working as a musician straight out of school.

I know my life is not a total disaster and I know I can improve things. I want to become more active and want to get rid of my cowardice. Just don't know how? and from where to start??

Please help!

Comments for no self-confidence.

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Wish I had more confidence
by: Anonymous

Hiya all Ive just started having 1 to 1 help to build up my confidence, I hope its gonna work because I cant go on much longer the way I'm feeling at the moment x

no self confidence
by: Kay

Thank you for contacting Positive Personal Growth. I don't for one minute think you are a coward. You stayed at school until age 21, and I think those who teased you at school because of this were ignorant and uncaring. You did a correspondence course, OK you didn't do a second year but the fact you tried, is a success.

Picking fights is not the sign of a brave man. It takes a braver man to walk away from a fight, walking away does not make him a coward. In fact most people would agree it is cowardly and ignorant to pick on people and fight them.

What is important is how you believe you are, and at the moment you believe you are a coward when the truth is that you aren't. It takes a brave person to strive to do things that are difficult due to fear of failure but still attempt them anyway.

What do you want to do? You say you have many talents? There is nothing you cannot do when you really put your mind to it. Pick the most important thing you want to do and give it a go. Believe you can do it and start working your way to completion. If you fail, and you may, don't get disheartened because, as I have said, there is success in failure, do it again, and again if necessary, until you succeed. Each time you attempt something your confidence will grow, whether you succeed or not, proving you don't give up trying.

Get that wrong thought of being a coward out of your mind, prove to yourself how brave you are by working through those talents you say you have.

You have to believe in yourself as a good, strong, confident man, and unless you have thoughts that make you feel this way you will always have those negative thoughts that will drag you down to make you doubt your ability.

Most of all believe that fighting is not a sign of bravery, and most importantly you are not a coward. Live your life through your talents and you will succeed.

I believe you have the ability to succeed and are a brave man. Trust in yourself.

Love
Kay

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