low confidence

A few years back I ran away from home for a very silly reason. I had a fight with another student, I was 17 at the time. I got suspended, I could not face my parents knowing that I had got suspended so I made a decision to go away. They didnt know where I was and they tried to find me all night, then they informed the police.

After a couple of days away I went to the police station to let them know I was fine and that I didnt want to go home, because now I was afraid that I had taken the step to leave my family that if I went back to them they would get me married to someone. I had heard many stories where this had happened.

As I am a muslim, it was a big disgrace to run away. I lived away for two months and finally my auntie got in touch with me and assured me that my famliy would not say anything to me or do anything. They only wanted me to come home safe.

After I came back my life has just gone down hill. For the first year my father kept a watchful eye on me and said I couldn't go back to education. I just stayed at home and went to my dad's workplace with him.

The second year I got a job and they agreed I could work there. Since then I have been in and out of a job for most of the time. I dont have a job at the moment or any friends. My father made me lose contact with all my old mates as he thought they had an influence in my running away.

I feel so down all the time, I dont really go out. I dont have the confidence to go into town on my own, or anywhere. I need help please.
Thanks.