I am 42, even that I am a "plus size" am a beautiful woman.
What I really do not understand is why I have to struggle so hard to live.
Since I was a little girl I always felt that I was a burden for the others that I was a mistake.
As I grew up I had dreams and hopes that I pursued with passion but nothing ever happened. I work hard and never seem to get anywhere. I have had good jobs and one day to another companies decides to close and I am laid off.
On the love department I have had bad relationships actually nothing serious. Somebody told me once "you live begging for love and only get the leftovers".
Nothing more true than that. Every man that got close was married or had another relationship I was only a cheap entertainment. No one has ever loved me. I gave up on love a long time ago.
I do not fit in either, I am not able to socialize because I am so different from the others that I don't have common interests with anybody.
Most people reach for me only when something from me is needed.
I no longer look or wait for anyone, I am just trying to live the best that I can, but keep myself isolated.
I really feel that I need something to warm my heart and make me happy. Only my cats and puppy love me.
I still feel like a burden and try not to interfere with the others, I think my best choice is to keep isolated.