I am completely lost and need help sorting out my direction

by Sally
(UK)

I am 35 years old and in need of help but do not know where to turn.

I am having a huge career crisis and have thoughts of doing something amazing but do not believe that I could cope.

I have just finished a degree in education (a one year top up course) because I want to help people and I have done adult teaching before but it is no longer what I want.

My Mum died last year unexpectedly at the age of 61 from brain tumors it was a huge shock. I promised her I would finish my degree which I did and it was a struggle to get through it and I did well.

I did this on the advice of my counsellor who said to do this and then reassess what I wanted to do then. I did much better than expected but after everything that has happened I have reassessed my life and what I want.

I really want to help people and from the age of 18 I have thought about nursing...I have even been accepted onto a nursing degree before but left as I was scared. I wonder if I could cope.

Now I keep on considering training to be a doctor after what happened to my Mum but I wonder if I have left it too late, and if I could handle it emotionally. I am a very sensitive and caring person so would it be too much?

I have something driving me to want to do medicine but at the same time I am scared. I have had depression in the past but have beaten it now but my self-esteem is a bit low due to the amount of jobs/career changes I have thought of.

Now I do not know what I am really capable of.

Please help.